"Just finished the Phase 1 workshop. Phenomenal!!. Thomas allows us to be who we are as we work through and process years of silenced trauma. I have never seen a place in the faith community where someone really practices the principle of "there is no condemnation" I finally found a place where I could say what was on my mind in purging the pain, guilt and shame without being censored and made to feel little, small and shameful. The analogy of the 3 hour life movie was a great illustration. I return home to my family with hope to live. The tears running down my face now, are sheer thankfulness and gratitude to a man who is blazing a trail for us male survivors in the community. May one day the community greet him with the welcome embrace he deserves."
"You helped me integrate my faith and the healing process. I had almost given up on God, wondering how He, being all powerful would let this happen to me. My bitterness at Him and my parents had plagued me my entire life and I didn't consciously see it, until you helped me see it at the retreat. My relationship with God is back on track and I'm still working with my therapist on the parent portion. I now can share my full experience with the therapist, which has made it so much easier."
"The HBM center has been one of most well rounded coaching programs I ever encountered, body, soul, and spirit. I have attended 3 workshops and continued with 1:1 coaching. In a two year period all the dysfunction and mayhem and self-sabotaging have been worked through. Thomas is a super effective caring resiliency coach. It was great to meet up with him again here in California this week." Mark S @california
" Quite an effective style and approach to dealing with CSA. At my request, Thomas privately coached me. In a few sessions, he surpassed and opened me up to insights concerning the sexual abuse and its effects that many of my mental health professionals left untouched in my years of therapy. Amazing! I am not a religious person and felt very comfortable with his style. No overbearing preachy style. Simiply one of compassion, concern and love. It was more about being open and receptive to what he's sharing with you and how he tailors to your needs. My advice: after reading the website, listening to the podcasts, and contacting Thomas, if that doesn't convince you to work with him, then you may not yet be ready."
I probably represent a myriad of pastors and men in church leadership who struggle with some of the effects of CSA. It has been difficult all these years holding this destructive secret inside and attempting to rescue myself. I am certain that many adult male survivors in religious roles fall into this same category. I really want to thank you for providing a perspective for helping me to see how the pornography served as a defensive mechanism to cope with what happened to me. It doesn't excuse the behavior; however it has provided answers to understanding some the behavior and strategies for battling it. - William -
"Thomas gave me my husband back and we were able to be a family again. It was quite scary at first. Randy couldn't even hold, touch or show affection to me or the children. After the suicide attempt the therapist recommended Randy get in touch with this organization. I wish we would have done this years ago."
"I am a young skeptical guy. I was very reluctant because this was faith based workshop. My recent experience with judgmental, condemning believers made me very hesitant. However, after talking with Thomas a few times, I realized he was different than those individuals I had encountered. At the workshop he didn't shove his religious beliefs down my throat. He shared from his perspective those principles of healing that collaborated between science, psychology and scripture. He has a great heart."
" I have never experience such an effective process like this. Your work, only 2 sessions so far, have really helped me identify things in my life that could be used against me and give them proper names so I can understand them and not judge myself so harshly."
" My life was falling apart several weeks ago. The excruciating pain my family has experienced in dealing with the CSA has been phenomenally devastating. Things I did not even realized were affecting us. I reached out to churches, pastors, but nothing. I was hurt and frustrated. You received my email and not only replied, but actually scheduled a call. I just wanted to let you know that call saved my life!"
There is nothing like this out there in the faith community for men, that I have encountered. It's more than just reading a book or listening to a lecture. It's true connection, application and strategies of working through the issues with someone who has gained expert knowledge, living this stuff and teaching it. It's not theory, it's real life. There's none of this "I can imagine what that felt like". Because he knows what it feels like.
"I had been working with my counselor for 5 years. She was nice, but I felt I needed more strategic intervention and application to address serious issues that were keeping me stuck. When I found out that Thomas was a survivor resiliency coach, I signed up. Phenomenal! There was serious coaching, support and action. Within one year I was reclaiming my life from the sexual abuse. I believe because he's lived this journey it's not about theories to him, it's what has worked in his life and others he's coached. When I had issues he was able to help me figure out strategies that uniquely worked for me."